Day 23 of Radiation

At my dad's radiation appointment today he was in such pain and was having such adverse reactions to treatments they have decided to discontinue treatment. He has been put on stronger pain killers to make him more comfortable, cream for his skin and another medication for his stomach. His chemo pump is still in place and was refilled today for 7 more days. So that will be the last of that, unless things change, which in this type situation things often do. He was sent for X-rays to see what is causing the pain, tomorrow they will receive the results. I have never seen my dad so weak and in such pain. He asks my mother to lay with him and just hold his hand. He is now in so much pain he isn't able to make the trips to see my grandmother and bless his heart, there are some heartless people that do not understand. My father himself is facing death and his more pain than I can imagine , he has been so brave and put his pain and cancer on the back burner to care for MawMaw and how dare anyone hold it against him that he can not physically make it there. During this experience I have seen the kindest hearted people right along with the coldest hearted, I only hope those people are NEVER faced with this type tragedy. Not 1 but 2 close family members with terminal diagnosis, not enough people to go around and trying to figure out every way to finance everything. Trust me when I say this is not a place to throw judgement. My job as well as others are not sympathetic to this situation, as it is not their own and all they know is they need me there, and I of course need the money, again torn.

I went and visited MawMaw today, she was still quite confused and wasn't eating. Her room had my artwork of pictures stuck to the wall and she told me who everyone in the pictures were, I think she knows something isn't right with my dad because she kept asking where he was, I called him and let her talk to him, a few minutes later she asked me where he was. I did manage to get her to eat a Nutri-Grain bar and drink some Sierra Mist (her new favorite drink), I had to hunt down at a gas station. The only way I got her to eat was to tell her I wasn't leaving until she finished every bite, and how late it was getting and I had to drive home to see my babies. :-) I figured whatever works, right? It worked so it was for the greater good. She is so precious to me. They both are I have been researching and searching for help and answers for my family, hopefully our prayers will soon be answered.
Love,
Karen