Saturday, March 14, 2009

Fairytales....

What little girl didn't love to hear fairy tales, tales of princesses, prince charming, fairies, wishes and dreams coming true. Here are the 2 definitions I found for fairy tales.
fairytale: a story about fairies; told to amuse children
fairytale: an interesting but highly implausible story; often told as an excuse.
Hmm... I should have read the disclaimer first, "This story is clearly for your amusement only, not true or plausible."

Cinderella: Father dies (not amusing), Raised by evil stepmother (not amused), made her clean 24/7 (what kinda people wrote this). Then her fairy godmother grants her wish to go to the ball, no no she did not wish to be free of the idiots she lived with, she wanted her a man. (Can you see where this is going). The prince maybe charming but that is all he did, the girls had to suffer to be with them. Cinderella was locked in a room, Aerial lost her voice and flipper, Aurora was put in a freaking coma, Jasmine ran away from home and was chained up and had to kiss that creepy guy, Rapunzel must have had a heck of a headache from everyone climbing on her hair, Geez. And what does Mr. Charming do, gallops in on his horse and saves the day. Wow guy... glad you could show up now, I could have used you when I was being broke down and sold as a slave. But apparently one kiss from this guy makes you forget everything and you live happily every after. WHAT?

"There is no Prince Charming.
He isn't coming to take you to the ball, rescue you from a watchtower, or save you from your evil stepmother.
You'll be lucky if you can get him to take out the trash.
Nothing is turning into a pumpkin but a damn seed.
If you are a fish, you will stay that way. No kiss will change that."